It’s rather sad I haven’t taken time to update the site in quite some time.

Would you believe I’ve been super duper busy?

That sounds so much better than neglectful!

The thing about the blog, other than the obvious, it being a testament and witness to some of the hardest and yet most beautiful moments in our marriage and family, is that I find myself increasingly seeing it as a beautiful memoir of moments long pass remembrance. In the mundane moments of life, those easily forgotten small and seemingly insignificant moments, I find myself seeing the utter beauty of each stage, each part of the journey we walk through as parents to Little B and as spouse to each other.

The last several weeks I’ve reminded myself to sit down a moment, to slow down and jot down some of my thoughts about life, here and now. I don’t want to walk through this part of our journey and not have taken a moment to reflect and to be grateful, always for changes big and small, and for the little things that make my life ever so sweet.

For one, and I know Little B would cringe at his momma admitting this, but I also know that he tangibly sees day in and out my love for him, my little boy is not a little boy anymore. I find myself laughing out loud when I hear one of his new friends call him Little Brooks. He’s just not so little any more and I can’t quite take it out of my vocabulary just yet (it used to be Baby Brooks for the longest… I’m sure we moved to VA with that name still on my lips) and his friends have apparently taken it as his nickname and freely call him that and he just as easily answers to it.

But he’s not so little anymore. The changes are both obvious and not so obvious and I find myself trying to wrap my mind around the fact that this 11 year old boy is transitioning into young adulthood. He’s not so much a boy anymore; he’s carefully navigating the balance between child and young man and we are navigating and guiding him while I’m learning to give him more space and Independence.

I’m grateful he’s just as loving and carefree and kind and sweet and energetic as always. He keeps me busy and laughing, always.

And then I find myself so very grateful for each moment with my Beau. I don’t take the fact that he’s home lightly or for granted. That man still makes me want to swoon, my heart skipping a beat at the sight of him. Little B may think it highly gross that we kiss and embrace and flirt in front of him, but I’m so grateful for not just the passion in our marriage (don’t worry, I’m keeping it rated G!) but also for the man that my husband is… the leader, the father, the husband, the provider, the one I can lean on and who knows me better than anyone. I’m so grateful to be married to my best friend.

When we attended Camp Better America way back when, it was such a turning point in our marriage. Deployments had taken their toll on our marriage. Yes, we loved each other, but we were tired and exhausted and something had to change. We were holding on, but not very gracefully and we both said unkind things to each other that are long forgotten and forgiven. Our patience had worn out with each other because part of the journey we were walking on was so very separate and for reasons that make total sense but that still hurt and caused anger and resentment to build, we were leaning less on each other.

Camp Better American changed that for us. It’s hard not to look at those few days as utterly life changing. It saved our marriage and brought us back to square one, where love overflows without ceasing, where grace abounds, where kindness and laughter and patience and LOVE is evident in all we do. We aren’t perfect, but man oh man, do I find myself grateful that each and every year since we attended CBA our marriage has gotten stronger, more passionate, more amazing and I know we both feel that we’re in a place that is so much better than the previous one.

Our time in VA was incredible. And you find yourself thinking, how can this get any sweeter, any better? And yet it does. I’m grateful for that. It takes work, obviously, and patience, and lots and lots of love. It takes serving each other, taking heed to each other’s needs and desires. Patience and kindness and remembering how grateful you are for the here and now.

So changes big and small, whether it be a move to a new place, a new period of growth and change in Our Boy, major tweaks to how we do school, new activities, or new schedules… I find myself embracing the new while every grateful for what was and what is to come.

Good things, all around.

For sure.

Advertisements