I’m officially spending most of my day tomorrow in my jammies. If it wasn’t for my Camp Fire group showing up for a meeting in the early evening for some fossil learning and “making” fun, I would be tempted to finish my day in the same state. I’m calling my first official rest and relaxation day, because the tempo of the past week, although doable and not entirely stressful, has deemed it so.

It’s been our first true week on any type of schedule after Brooks’ departure. I’ve been quite pleased with how on task we’ve been, as well as the activities we’ve immersed ourselves in. Staying busy keeps you focused, and well, sane, while you try to adapt to a new normal without your spouse. And it would all be peachy and wonderful if not for the lack of sleep I’ve been experiencing since the deployment began.

Staying up until one and two in the morning is just not conducive to meeting the demands of raising a very high energy, creative little boy. Especially when sleeping past six or seven in the morning is just not doable for me.

I’ve experienced deployments where sleeping has been an anomaly because getting used to sleeping without Brooks in the house has been nearly impossible. This deployment I’ve felt so centered, and again, been so busy, that sleeping should be the least of my worries. But I can’t sleep. Regardless of really, really trying.

So tonight, while visiting a wonderful friend (and dropping off her V-Day muffins and being treated to hot cocoa) I happened to mention my lack of sleep, wondering if she was facing a similar problem. Because truly and honestly I just felt like it wasn’t related to the deployment. My friend, and might I add, I absolutely love the insight our dear friends can bring to our lives about our very own selves, asks me without even blinking if it could have anything to do with all the cola I scored at the commissary the week past, for thirty cents per 2 litter bottle.  I was really excited about scoring that cola for so cheap! 30 cents!

I should point out that I’ve recently recovered from both kidney stones (in December) and a severe kidney infection (January). I”m supposed to be laying off the cola, but it’s just so hard, and tastes so good. I really need a twelve step program. It’s quite honestly my only vice. I won’t divulge how much cola I’ve been consuming, because I’m bound to get a super severe talking to by my better half when he reads this, but suffice it to say I am on my last 2 litter bottle of cola.

What the kidney stones and infection were unable to do, perhaps my insomnia will fix. Because if I don’t start sleeping soon I’m not quite sure how I’ll get through February, let alone the rest of the year. I’m super exhausted! I’m ever grateful for friends who can see the things we aren’t able to see about ourselves, and aren’t scared or shy to tell it how it is!

For sure and for certain I am extremely thankful to be homeschooling, because tomorrow I can wake up in my pj’s AND remain that way. Well at least until fivish or so…

and no cola for me.